Our First Graduation Party

Well, what can I say?   The event came in like a lion and went out like a lamb, but oh, the flurry of activities that occurred in-between.   Our area is big enough such that we actually have three larger, more  formal graduation ceremonies dedicated to homeschoolers in the area.  Can you imagine what that says about how far homeschooling has become??!!   In the last few weeks the oldest has posed with and without cap and gown, and we have all worked very hard to create lasting memories for the graduation event.   Personally, I was just happy to be able to blow dust from my scrapbooking tools, even if my time ran out on me toward the day of the event.   How do you compile 18 years of memories onto a science fair board?    Here was my honest attempt; unfortunately, you cannot see the books of pictures underneath the cover photos (courtesy of Dinah Zike’s Books of Books, LOL).

Our whole family became consumed with putting everything together so that this would be the celebration for us all that it truly is.   The kids did a marvelous job, though I do not think any of us gained a new-found interest in the detailing that accompanies true culinary skill.    Nevertheless, we did our best to work Henry Ford’s assembly line…

transforming this…

into these (in her new school colors, even!).

Then of course came the event that we waited for.   With tens of friends and family who thought enough of our daughter to dedicate a Saturday to her, we all watched as this high schooler became an “official” graduate (see the chocolate drop, 2nd row, toward the middle right of the photo).

Following the graduation ceremony came an awesome reception.    As I think about it now, I can recall Dawn writing to me, saying, “Make someone take pictures for you.”   Sadly, that’s the ONE thing that did not happen, especially at the reception.    I absolutely hate that, but maybe it was a lesson in pride for me.   I was SO excited about the way all the food turned out–the Asian chicken wings, the cheescake bites with the special decorative toothpicks, the chocolate caps (shown above), etc.    I was so ready to show off all of our hard work.  After writing about being the non-party planner (see here), I was thrilled at the idea of displaying my results.    But, therein lies the problem; had it all gone the way I wanted, I would have presented Belinda’s show, and that would not have accurately captured the spirit that was in the room.   God showed up, and it was unlike any graduation ceremony I have had the pleasure of attending, even though our daughter’s celebration was the catalyst for gathering everyone together.   I loved how the Lord really spoke through people about the power of His hand on a child’s life and about who He has been in our family’s life.   It was ministry, and the overwhelming emotion of the moments was tears–tears of relief, tears of gratitude, tears of joy.

Oh, well, at least we got a shot of her with her cake.   AND, many people thought all the food was catered!!  I suppose that’s compliment enough.  We will do this again in a couple of years, and I repent right now for bragging on my new-found talent and skill.   Blessings, dear friends.

How to Pick the Right Curriculum

Before you get too excited, let me say that this article will not suggest any one curriculum, or devalue any other curriculum. There are far too many choices out there for me to offer much wisdom in that area. Indeed, homeschooling has come a long way from the few publishers that would actually sell to a homeschooling family; now homeschooling conventions look almost as polished and slick as those industry fairs where I once manned a corporate booth. That reality is one of the inspirations behind this article. It is about this time of
year when I “hear” new mothers all over the States write to say, “I’m a new homeschooler with a few questions…” How does this parent, with an overwhelming number of curriculum from which to choose, make a wise decision?  Read my thoughts on this dilemma in an article I penned for Heart of the Matter Online this month…

 

His Way Home School, Graduating Class of 2013

The World’s Standard is a Set-Up

Soon, I will write a post about our plans for next year’s school/ curriculum plans; it’s about that time, and for a variety of reasons, I’ve already had to think about what changes will occur in our school, and what will stay the same.   For now, however, I am simply enjoying our few remaining weeks, and surviving—not thriving—in the number of interruptions that continue to attempt to overtake our day.

One of my greatest joys right now is the time spent in the Word with our younger two.   I’ve been somewhere between curious and apprehensive about the book of Leviticus.

God is so faithful.  From the first chapter, I knew where we were going: God set a standard.   Before He gave the details on what to bring, how to bring it, etc., He simply states that He wants our best.  Verse 3 of Chapter 1 states,  ‘If the offering is a burnt offering from the herd, you are to offer a male without defect. You must present it at the entrance to the tent of meeting so that it will be acceptable to the Lord.’   Reading this passage gave us an excellent opportunity to talk about how flawed our standards are in light of what He expects.

Often the children will gauge themselves according to how someone else is doing.   Their behavior is good relative to someone else’s actions.   Their performance was good because someone else did not do as well.   While the outside world helps us with an understanding of the norm, there are several problems with this type of comparison.

1) It sets us up for less than our best if the standard is lower.

2) We use external measures for correction rather than internal reflection; the latter often reveals uncomfortable truths that, if we surrender them to the Father, can accelerate our growth.

3) Being satisfied with earthly means and measures of success can often mean that we are out of sync with the will of God (1 Peter 2:9, John 15: 18-21)

As an adult, I find myself making similar comparisons.   And for all the same reasons, the world’s standard is a set-up.   The kids and I even talked about this from a corporate perspective.   I’ve shared in previous posts about some of the programs at our church, and many churches, who have become increasingly seeker-friendly (you can read more about the seeker-friendly church movement here or in tons of other places).    Though we still use common church vernacular (words like ‘sin,’ ‘repentance,’ ‘salvation,’ etc.), we still stand with many congregations that, in reaching out to the un-churched, are losing a generation of young adults and kids who are hungry for Truth.   In short, the world is increasingly loving the church, but is our behavior acceptable to the Lord?

So, as I ask the children when we read the Word together, what does the Lord want us to do?    Well, personally, I thought about an experience I had with the oldest and a substandard midterm.    We went 15 rounds about what I wanted but didn’t explicitly state, and how she performs for others versus her performance for me.   I see now where the Word in Leviticus 1 would have worked–if I’d worked it.   It’s really not about me; ultimately, it’s about remembering who you are and to whose standard you are subject (Colossians 3:23).    My standard should not be the standard for our school; all of our work should be our best, for this is acceptable to God.

How’s the rest of Leviticus going?    The youngest says, “All these  sacrifices sound alike.”    Our vegetarian son summarizes each chapter as “more Old Testament killing.”  This kid and his growing sensitivity to meat and meat products scares me.    I can’t even cook dinner without him saying, “Do you realize how many ______(name your land or sea creature) had to die for you to enjoy those?”   We may not get much more than a new level of expectation out of this one, but that will be enough.

The Race is NOT Given to the Swift…

courtesy of http://www.sitepoint.com

After our three-day weekend, I sat down on Sunday night with our son’s school planner and a very simple plan: wake up early and get a full day’s school in before the older two leave for dance classes and I drive the youngest to her book club meeting at the library.   But I forgot some things.

I forgot that our license tag sticker on the car had expired as of yesterday, and if I did not get it renewed, the oldest and I would drive around on grace probably until Friday.

I forgot that the youngest had a pair of new glasses that failed to arrive before Easter, and so they would surely call this morning for her to be fitted, and of course, I could not wait until this evening because of the book club meeting.

So, after another night of broken rest, I got up at the last minute to drop the oldest off at college and then get the new sticker.   Our son’s job was to get breakfast (cereal) for himself and the youngest and get their school day started.    I LOVE that the kids are old enough now to delegate tasks.

On the way to college, the oldest and I talk about her gum infection, which has kept her from eating for almost a week and still is not completely healed.    We agree that I need to consult with the orthodontist about extending her prescription.

Sure enough, as I am driving to get the sticker, the eye doctor calls; I speak with him briefly, then call our son to tell him that plans have changed.   Tell the youngest to get dressed, and I will swing by the house to pick her up and get to the eye doctor.

As we leave the eye doctor, it hits me that I wanted to buy some roti to carry our son and I through the week with Dad away, but the vendor operates on a cash-only basis, so we have to trek by the bank, which brings me to the next thing I forgot: it is the first of the month.  Grrr…

I spend a minute (literally 45, to be exact) with the younger two at home before jumping in the car to get the oldest from college.   In route, I speak with the orthodontist, who adds a pharmacy trip to the day.   On the way home, cash in hand, the oldest and I get to the roti shop.    I also forgot how many people, including the local schools, take a vacation on the Monday after Easter.   No roti today.

By the time I get home, I am whipped, and it is barely noon.

This glimpse into the morning’s first few hours is a small microcosm of what has been happening in my life for the past few days and weeks.   There is enough going on for me to become quite frustrated.  Yet the Lord continues to show His grace and mercy, and a number of calming thoughts have come in waves to give me peace that passes human understanding.  I don’t always understand why I don’t have even more worries!

A constant theme in my life, and consequently on my blog, is the whole concept of being productive/ planning/ redeeming the time.   It occurs to me as I often ponder how I got here that when you are an educated woman with abilities to do a number of things and do them well, you get pulled in a number of areas.   And on one hand, there is nothing wrong with that–as long as you know when to say “when.”   Here are some other thoughts I have had about my time while on this earth:

Stay focused on purpose.   As Rick Warren states so much more eloquently, just because you can do something does not mean you should.   There are a number of items that compete for my attention.  Some are projects that I genuinely need to make time for, like home maintenance and improvement projects (I dare not list them out).  Some are projects that I enjoy, but just do not have time for right now, like sewing or scrapbooking.   Some items are just fun, like “visiting” around on Facebook–but do I really have the time?   And is this activity furthering my progress or fulfilling my purpose?    Well, yes and no…

Keep the main thing, well, the main thing.   I have overall prorities; I grow increasingly clear on my purpose.   Yet, I also have to submit my schedule to the Lord each day, allowing His wisdom to guide me in what needs to be accomplished on that day.  And though I know some will disagree, it is not always as simple as husband second, children third, etc.  If I went about every day in that order, I would never do anything else, as family is a non-stop ministry.  Plus, it would not allow the children to grow into the necessary self-sufficiency for them to function as young adults.   Some days, laundry is the main thing.  Other days, grades or a writing deadline might be the main thing.  And yes, many days, family is the main thing.

A list is your friend.   When I worked outside of my home, planning the day, complete with A, B, and C priorities,  was a part of my morning, over-coffee routine.  At home, however, I might heat my tea three times before I actually make a list, and then I write items that I have completed and check them off just to give myself a feeling of accomplishment.   Getting up before the kids would be of immense help here, but let’s face it: I have not sprung forward well.  Yet, I have been using my phone for more of its total functionality as a tool, not just a toy. My calendar has each week’s activities loaded, and I am using my “memo” app to keep track of my notes, and–check me out– I even wrote the lion’s share of this blog post with it!!  Yay me!!!

The Scriptures say that the race is not given to the swift nor to the strong, but to the one who endures until the end.   May our wonderful Counselor guide us each day in how to run our races such that others might see us and glorify Him who is in Heaven.

A Party for the Non-Party Planner

May 11th. 

courtesy of karaspartyideas.com

That’s the day of our city-wide homeschool graduation ceremony.   As I put together these last 9-10 weeks of lesson plans, I am constantly reminded of how close that date really is relative to today.   Even more staggering, for lack of a better word, is the fact that our oldest has even less time in actual school days.   Her days at His Way Home School will actually come to a close by the end of April.   (I am anticipating the revolt from my younger two when she is finished versus the 3 or so weeks that they’ll have left).   With that being a fact, I sense time as an increasingly looming presence that constantly tugs at me, reminding me of the many items that I basically have, at this point, about one month to complete.

One of those many items–with several subsets of tasks underneath–is to put together a graduation party.   Can I be honest?   That is sssssssssoooooooo not me.    I’d be happy to invite the family and a few close friends over to pots and paper plates, eat and greet, and call it a day.   In fact, this whole listing of tasks before the “big day” brought back distant memories of my own high school graduation events.   I graduated during the same weekend in which a dear cousin of mine got married.   Translation: a whole lot of family with a whole lot to do.   And true to the nature of a big, Southern family, we fellowshipped and ate together every night, celebrating each event in its turn.   I don’t recall having any regrets about that time.   I’m sure I won’t regret this time, either, but I’m not looking forward to the numbers of people and the general hustle and bustle of sitting through a graduation ceremony–or at least some of it–then running off to prepare for a reception.   The introvert in me just can’t get ready for all the activity, and I feel only one semi-emotion when I think about the day: anxious.    BUT, the oldest asked for a party for her graduation; she’s not asked for a party in almost 10 years, and everyone around us–immediate family and friends–has that gentle, electric buzz about her big day to come, and all the plans of her young adulthood that will take new shape and form as she leaves our home.   So, here we go.

courtesy of deliciousdeliciousdelicious.blogspot.com

Enter Pinterest.   My dear friend Kerimae blogged recently about the impact of computers, and how the digital age has taken as much–if not more–than it has given us in our quest for effectiveness and efficiency.   At least, that’s what I got out of her post.  As I shared with her, the computer has cost me a lot.   Work requires that I spend hours on it; home education requires that I engage with computers, and technology in general.   Building a business demands that I use social media networks, i.e., free advertising, to my advantage.    My sacrifice is that I don’t get to do some other fun and necessary items, like spending time out-of-doors weeding, walking, and generally taking in the fresh air.  BUT, one thing a computer has done for me is to expand my knowledge base and comfort level very quickly in areas with which I’m totally unfamiliar and/or hopelessly inadequate.

I will confess that I didn’t really see the point of Pinterest for a long time; I joined because it seemed to be the flow of traffic in terms of social media, and I thought it’d be another way to keep up with friends.   I have an Evernote account that allows me to store and access my favorites from any computer, so what is the point, right?   Yet, with Pinterest being such a visual medium, I thought it might be the perfect place to find party ideas and foods that are simple enough to prepare, and pretty enough to make a visually striking party.   A basic search of ‘graduation party ideas’ did not disappoint.   I spent hours “pinning” pictures to my own boards after finding tons of simple food ideas that I could combine with minimal catering and look as if I actually have some skill in this area.  These pictures are just a few of the  ideas I found, but probably won’t incorporate.   Are you as amazed as I am at the creativity of people??!!

There are still other party-related items that must happen.  Interestingly enough, while I drafted this post, Office Depot sent a discount code for graduation invitations–talk about God’s hand.   Another dear friend who dabbles in professional photography offered to take the oldest’s graduation pictures gratis–another blessing.  I even found party items for her intended college of choice, thanks to Party City.   Also, my Pinterest party idea board has several links to printables and other simple food ideas.    Perhaps the most telling–or embarrassing, dependent upon how you look at it–part of this whole digital revelation is that actually, I was inspired by the youngest, who began searching for themes for her upcoming sleepover–a party that I’ve not “officially” gotten on board with, by the way.   True to her nature, she already has a list of invitees, a schedule, a budget based upon what she found at Party City, and yes, she, too, has perused blogs and Pinterest for party ideas–far before I thought to do so.   Gotta love these grown-ups in miniature bodies.

Now if I can pare our list of invitees down to a realistic number of what the room will hold, and if I can learn to not be so heavy-handed with my food glue, i.e., corn syrup, someone just might think that I had a good time with this whole thing.  

5 Great Lessons after the Exodus

I have been deliberate about making sure our children read the entire Bible after returning home from a children’s workshop in which the following statement was made: the average American who considers him/ herself a Christian has never read the entire Bible.   Not even once.  This statement put into perspective for me so much about why people who are raised in church can operate so differently on Monday-Saturday.   It also was a stark and painful reminder of my own earliest adult years, when it became obvious through my own life that while church attendance is important, it would not, in and of itself, sustain me as a Christian.    Yet, ironically enough, when I began our original study of the entire Bible with the older two, I made very conscious decisions to skip certain portions.    Moses as an author?  Too boring once the Ten Commandments were handed down.  One prophet sounded similar to another, so why cover them all?  Same premise with the Gospels: as an adult I know that the four authors had different perspectives in what they shared and why, but I wanted to press onward.   I say all of this tongue-in-cheek, but my real “eye” for what we covered was, what would keep it interesting/ engaging for the children?   Bear in mind also that the kids were much younger when we began this first journey.   I’ve since realized the arrogance of that decision.   All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness (2^nd Timothy 3:16).   So, this trip around, with the oldest on her own and the youngest in tow, we are reading each and every Word.

We are in the last chapters of Exodus right now, studying the making of the tabernacle—down to the cubit.   After we read, I ask the children, “What is God saying to us today?”   The youngest says some version of this answer: “Well, like we talked about before, the Lord is into details and wants order.”   Her tone says it all: ‘I’m tired of reading about cubits and acacia wood, and if I see one more piece of purple/red/blue cloth…’   I feel her.   After all, it wasn’t too long ago that I chose to skip this portion of scripture entirely.   But, as the Shepherd so often does, He leads His sheep to great places in our studies—if we hang in there with Him.   Here are five lessons that I’ve discovered from our reading—repeatedly–about cubits and wood:

1)      The Lord uses ordinary people and equips them with what they need.   Bezaleel and Aholiab were given positions of tremendous responsibility, but, as the Word says, God filled them with the Spirit (first!), and skills, abilities, knowledge, and all manners of workmanship.  Did they come empty-handed?  No.  Aholiab was a craftsman from the tribe of Dan.   But their ordinary gifts in the extraordinary hands of the Master produced an awesome work.   In fact, Bezaleel’s name is still mentioned in modern-day culture regarding design firms and architecture of all sizes.

2)      The importance of operating in mercy toward one another.   Once the frame for the tabernacle was built, the first piece of furniture to follow was the mercy seat.   I personally think this is significant.   God thought it was most important; we should see it as important, too, and use this lesson as a model for how we treat others.  Mercy requires that we believe the best in people, that we give them the benefit of the doubt, and that we truly embrace James 1:19–slow to speak, slow to anger (please, Lord Jesus), and quick to listen (again, please, Lord Jesus).

3)      There is unprecedented favor and anointing when you operate in your assignment. These two men, Bezaleel and Aholiab, were the lead construction engineers, in modern-day terms.  We never hear from them again.  They might have been called upon as leaders to give direction or expertise, but they didn’t use their influence and sphere of control to try and replace Moses; they weren’t looking to become priests.   They operated in what was their assignment, with marvelous results.   Recently, I have had the opportunity to do some freelance writing that I would have enjoyed, and I thought that because the information was presented to me—indirectly—it must have been for me.   But God gave me a Word through our pastor about the danger of stepping out from under the covering of Christ, even when it appears to be a good thing.   I knew almost immediately that I needed to reconsider.

4)      In all things, God wants our best.   When you read the word gold, there is an imagery that strikes the mind, or at least, that strikes my mind: fancy, elegant, eye-catching, and expensive. This was a portable tent, for goodness’ sake!  Linen can be fancy, too, but what’s with the purple, blue, and red?   Well, our history studies tell us that purple was a very expensive dye color to prepare.   To make it, you had to crack open a shellfish called a trumpet shell.   Because of the expense of this process, purple (and its derivatives, I imagine) was only available to royalty.  Remember that Lydia (Acts 16:14-15) was a dealer of purple cloth, from which you could infer that she had a certain amount of influence in the city.  I believe in part that that’s why her baptism was significant—she was a person that others noticed.

5)      Be obedient to what God places in your heart.   I am often amazed when a person says, “God spoke to me and said…,” or after praying for me, the person will say, “The Lord says…”   I can’t help but wonder how they know it was God who spoke to them.   I have this image of burning bushes or doves or some other miraculous show of God’s presence.   Yet, my own experience with God “speaking” to me is the same as Watchman Nee described in his The Spiritual Man: God speaks through our conscious and our intuition, and even in our subconscious dreams,
confirming it through His Word (which is why it’s sooooo important to actually read the Bible and know what it says).   Too many times, we dismiss what goes through these psychological venues, and it’s how we can easily miss a God move.   In these final chapters, the Lord gave Bezaleel and Aholiab wisdom to construct the temple, but He also gave the people a heart to give, providing for the construction.   That person that we always think about is an opportunity to intercede for them in prayer; that idea that keeps us up at night can be the beginning of a thriving and successful business.  Don’t discount the gentle tugging at your heart to do something; it could be the key to unlocking a blessing.

I know that there are great books out there for children that cover the Bible and have fun activities to help children with learning.   But I struggle with these in the same way that I struggle with many of the bells and whistles that are increasingly becoming a part of our youth and children’s ministry, as well as ministries across the country.  I talk more about that in article I wrote here.   I don’t think God’s Word needs ostentation, and at some point, all the videos, games and toys can be a distraction from the meat of the Word.  In our home, we read, we discuss, and I believe God to grow those planted seeds.   Our closing prayer over our Bible study has been the same for years now, as originally stated by a pastor of ours: ‘May the Lord add a blessing to the reading and the hearing of His Holy Word, and may it instruct and inspire us in both our public and private lives.’   I trust Him to do just that.   And while the kids will prayerfully have many years to read the Word again and again on their own, I do want to model 2^nd Timothy 3:16 in our home as training for what they should do in homes of their own.

Can’t wait to see what the Lord does for us when we get to Numbers (yikes).