What’s New? From Our Point of View…

It is a beautifully sunny, 74-degree day here in coastal Texas, and with the oldest at college and our son at the dentist, the youngest decided to school outside.   Funny, this was my vision when we first began homeschooling—days outside on a picnic blanket, completing schoolwork and viewing exotic animals.   (You can stop laughing now).   The vision sounded wonderful, and the outdoor school day sounded delightful until it met with my own plans and realities.   I had a fairly simple morning plan to complete a few chores and write a blog entry while the youngest worked beside me at the table.   So, it shames me to say that when she initially approached me about going outside, I sent her out and continued with my plans.   I felt bad, so when she came back inside the first time, I said, “Let me just do ____ and I’ll come out with you.”     I got that pot of vegetarian chili to a point where it could just simmer, started that load of clothes, and then pulled up a chair alongside her in the backyard.   That’s when I realized that even 74 degrees—in full sun—is still just plain hot.    After reading for a spell, we both gave in to what became our heart’s deepest longing–air conditioning.

One of our struggles this year has been sustaining her with a deliberate diet of rich literature versus twaddle, in Charlotte Mason vernacular.   Our youngest, with all the extroversion that missed our older two, wanted to start a book club this past year.   She had almost completed all the planning, complete with convincing Mom that this was a good thing, when our local library announced its plans to have a book club.    I thought this was too much of a coincidence to be a coincidence, and we hurriedly signed up to be a part of their event.   Now I wish that I had stuck with the original plan to have our own club.   The selection of books that the librarians offer—yuck!!!      I would love to simply pull her from the club, but I’m torn by the fact that she likes being a part of the group, she enjoys the time and activities, and—here’s the kicker—she likes the books.  They are much easier reading, for sure, but based upon what I consider to be a “good” book, i.e., a story that engages the mind and pricks the heart, the book club’s selections are way past poor.   The longer I allow this, of course, the more difficult it is to interest the youngest in books that demand more of her.   Consequently, I’ve not pulled her yet from the club, but have been instead picking my teachable moments.   As an example, we are now reading The Whipping Boy, which is actually very easy to read—a short book with short chapters.   Upon reading chapter 1, she immediately stopped to whine empathetically when she realized what was the whipping boy’s  responsibility (to receive the punishment that should have been given to a spoiled brat excuse for a prince).    While she was sharing how badly she felt for the boy, I talked about the power of a good read and recalled that she’d never stopped to empathize with Vordak the Incomprehensible.   She still maintains that Vordak is the best book ever (heavy sigh).

While I ponder what to do about the book club, I am excited about the cursive handwriting curriculum from LightHome Publications I found on Currclick.  Can you say $6??!!   This looks awesome!!  A chance to share the Word of God, to practice cursive handwriting, and to create a lasting keepsake of the Word in Psalms!!  Can’t beat it with a stick!!

After years of, ahem, uncertainty, shall we say, about homeschooling my MIL blessed us with an entire high school biology curriculum—teacher’s guides, transparencies, DVDs, videos,… everything!   I have been thrilled with all the extra project ideas that have come with the text that really cater to how we like to learn.   The publisher of this not-so-dry text has actually partnered with Dinah Zike (foldables guru, author of The Big Book of Books) to include manipulatives to enhance the content!!  Given Dinah Zike’s popularity within the homeschool community, I couldn’t help but think this was pretty cool in an odd sort of way.

Our school this year is a gentle foreshadowing of the next 2-3 years to come as the oldest spends a significant amount of time away from us.   Her classes keep her away on Mondays and Wednesdays, but the extracurricular activities associated with the Honors Program, plus the time to complete her coursework actually occupy her throughout a good portion of her week.   My dh and I were just discussing today that even though she wasn’t the noisiest of our children, her presence, or lack thereof, is definitely felt if not heard.    Her high school courses this year include Algebra II, Physics, and World Geography.    Other than that, I’m the taxi cab driver!

During the summer, Knowledge Quest distributed what I assume was a preview of their Globalmania curriculum, but it was PERFECT (yes, I’m shouting) for what I wanted to do with World Geography.     There is enough of a guide-like feel to this .pdf file without it being too prescriptive.   I played the games that help with map memorization and, in completing them myself to get a feel on what the oldest would do, I determined that my geography needs serious work.  No wonder I almost failed this class in middle school ( LOL)!!  There is also a schedule that, again without being too prescriptive, suggests how to spend time learning a specific continental region.    What I have added (because without the additions the curriculum might be more elementary) is the idea of research of the continents to find out more about the history and culture, and the idea of understanding a major religion in that region and how you might evangelize with respect to what the people believe.    Finally, when I taught World Geography at our local homeschool store, that particular curriculum set a goal for a student to draw a world map from memory by the end of the course.   I so loved the students’ results that I incorporated this same goal for the oldest.   I’m enjoying watching her get started, and her illustrations of how much she is learning.

 

 

I am so glad, in spite of the fact that American Lit at the college level has her permanently attached to a Norton’s Anthology, that we made the decision to add in as many living books as we could to complement her studies.    She decided early on that audio books would best help her keep up with everything.    This was easily accomplished with Jules Verne’s Around the World in 80 Days, but we’ve been reading aloud Homer Hickam’s October Sky together.   The latter book has been a welcomed accompaniment to her Physics studies, and I’m so glad that I didn’t place too much stock into the warning that this coming-of-age story had potentially inappropriate subject matter.  Yes, he’s a love-struck teenage boy who is learning, unsuccessfully, how to be suave with the ladies (picture Jerry Lewis in “The Ladies’ Man”), but what far overshadows those moments is this book’s ability to take you through Coalwood, WV with such imagery until you feel as if you stepped back 40 years and are standing alongside one of the “rocket boys.”    We even resisted the urge to watch the movie.  (Was it just a coincidence that it came on television while we were reading?   Hmmm….)   After Jules Verne, I’m on the hunt for what might our next great geography-related find: Moby-Duck: The True Story of 28,800 Bath Toys Lost at Sea and of the Beachcombers, Oceanographers, Environmentalists, and Fools, Including the Author, Who Went in Search of Them.   If I could just find the audio book for something less than $27…

 

What’s new with your studies?   I’d love to “hear” about all those cool and creative homeschool  studies.

 

Final College Visits

 Though it seems as if the season came and went, Dad and the oldest took what should be the final two college visits earlier this spring.    This trip actually came on the heels of the Titus 2:1 Conference in Washington, D.C., and after I headed home, those two kept traveling north to look at a couple of intriguing places for our daughter’s new home.   She’d never experienced the northeast before, with all of its hussle and bussle, its pace, and its “real-ness,” so to speak, so Philadelphia was a great place to see very different sides of a different part of the world.

You’ll forgive me that, between recuperating from illness as well as taking too long to post this entry after the actual trip, my summaries are alot shorter than some of the earlier visits we took to different campuses.  

Philadelphia University was in many ways a perfect school for our daughter.    It is suburban , but still allows access to all of Philadelphia.     It is a smaller school, which we wanted for her, given that she’s leaving from a school population of 3.   The college had wonderful opportunities within her intended major, both academic and otherwise.    She could stay an extra year and receive a Masters’, which was a strong plus.    Also, the University had done a great job of incorporating current trends and issues into the program design, making it more relevant for a person just entering school.    There was a significant emphasis placed on using your knowledge, skills and talents to give back to the community through service; I think this is where our volunteer queen began to fall in love.   

Yet, its rustic charm and secluded campus left her with a looming question: will I really fit in here?   Everything about the school is northeast suburban; there were no cheap chains at which to eat, no student-friendly places to shop, and in general, no obvious love for the have-to-ask-cuz-you-can’t-afford-it crowd.

We move on.

Drexel had nearly everything that our budding academician wanted, especially the focus on co-ops as an integral part of the graduation process.   The campus was large enough to offer numerous extracurricular opportunities.      And she still recalls that, unlike Philadephia U, she did see a Chick-Fil-A  🙂    

There was just one BIG problem, at least from where the oldest stood:

Drexel is in the heart of downtown Philadelphia.   Though our girl is a city girl, a city of this size was a bit overwhelming for her.    Her dad also took her on a short city bus ride and through the subway system so that she could get an even more realistic sense of what her life would be.    She left convinced, at least for the moment, that this school might not be as high on the list as some others.    Bear in mind that my comments about public transportation are not meant as a slam on anyone who has to or chooses to use these ways to get around.   But as a southwestern girl who has lived in a town built for wide open speed all her life, the oldest’s experience was…an adjustment, shall we say?

I give her this credit, though.   After getting home and thinking about it more, she didn’t throw the baby out with the bathwater, and is still taking  a hard look at both schools.

Perhaps the best part of this trip for me is that she got to see Washington, D.C., as well as Philadephia.   These are, for whatever other issues they may have, two of the most historically significant cities in our nation, and ground that I’ve wanted to cover with all the children.   

Though most of these places you can’t just walk up and touch or take a tour as you did when I was there, it is still a history moment like no other when you see the place that you spent weeks reading about in a book and realize the spirit of what came before you.

Rocky Balboa climbed these same steps in his now infamous celebration dance.   May she soar equally as high, whereever she goes.

More College Visits

As I posted in my highlights for February post, in addition to the busy-ness of home life and homeschool, we are also in full swing with the process of helping our oldest make a decision regarding where she’ll spend the next several years once she leaves our home.   You can see our first college visit here.   Dad hit the road with her this month (envision Martin Lawrence with Raven Symone in “College Road Trip”)–two universities, two markedly different experiences, two consequently different impressions.

The first stop:

Visiting Texas Womens’ University was more of a parent-driven activity than anything encouraged by the oldest, and that bit of background seemed to shape the day.   If it is any indication of her lack of interest, these pictures were captured by my husband on his cell phone; the oldest took none with her camera.

Pros

We really liked the size of this campus.    Although the oldest envisions herself at a larger state school (though not too large), we see the potential for large state school-related distractions, and would prefer a more intimate environment.   She also had no interest in attending a single-sex university, so it is good, at least for her,  that TWU is now opening its doors to males.   Though male enrollment is small, it is a step in the right direction for our daughter’s perceived needs.   The campus is also very near Dallas, where there are a number of outside cultural events related to her interests.  Last, but certainly not least, this campus is the most cost-effective for us of all the places that she’s shown interest in thus far.   It is not far from home, and the tuition, etc., are very affordable.   This was perhaps the point where we were willing to push her to at least take a look, pointing out to her that her brother is not far behind her, so we have to make decisions that benefit all parties involved.

Cons

The biggest disappointment was that TWU did not sell the program that interests her well at all.  

First, the program head had a scheduling conflict, and consequently, students were there to represent her particular school.    Though there was some value in this, and students can definitely offer a perspective, there was no one to speak to the program at a high level–approach to learning, philosophy behind the what and why of courses required, availability of internships and how they happen, etc.  I loved the fact that this level of conversation was so critical to our daughter; where did this mature young lady come from? 😉

My husband was also not pleased by the limited housing offered to students–a big consideration for me, at least, as I’ve experienced the horror of having to find apartments, inconsiderate roommates, etc. when housing was no longer available.   My husband also felt that there was no ideal “perfect” housing for a student’s needs (internet access, safety in the evening versus traffic through the university, etc.)

Our daughter returned home a bit more in like, but definitely not in love, with this campus.

Not long after, she made her second trip in as many weeks.

 

 I’ll answer the obvious question first, with all the candor that is me: “Why is a black girl from Texas even considering Iowa State University?” I’m glad you asked!  😉

In the fall of 2010, the oldest attended a local college fair.   For obvious reasons, the lines to see representatives of UT (in these parts that’s Texas, not Tennessee) and Texas A&M were long.   Other schools were helpful, but not necessarily engaged in a conversation that “sold” their school, so to speak.    The ISU rep impressed the oldest, and she was increasingly intrigued when we shared that my middle sister completed work for her Doctorate there–largely at the University’s expense.   Indeed, the rep spoke of a number of scholarship opportunities that could possibly be available to the oldest, and went out of his way to follow up on all of her questions.   They have subsequently “courted” the oldest with a barrage of e-mails, post cards, etc. from then until now.   In short, they spoke all of our language.   BUT, this is also our cold-natured girl who walks around the house with a bathrobe on top of day clothes–in July.   Our immediate reservation was that Iowa in the winter would be entirely too cold for her.   She was insistent that she could handle it, so we bought her the warmest category jacket Land’s End sold, insulated all-weather boots, and packed her off for a trip up to Ames in the midst of a snowstorm.

From my husband’s perspective, this was a very different experience from dragging the horse to water at TWU; she LOVED it.

 

 

 

 

(Notice the immediate difference in quantity and quality of pictures!)

Pros

Perhaps this is the case with all larger, state schools, but this place knew a thing or two about how to recruit a potential candidate.   We were called days before her visit to be sure that we were coming; they knew her intended major, who would be there, and all the amenities were laid out.    She spoke with everyone, from a resident advisor, to the admissions director, to the department head for her intended major, and of course, to other students.    The facilities were exceptional.   I feared momentarily that she’d had a brief love affair with the snow–rare in these parts–but she returned home sharing a number of advantages of their program:

1) it is one of the top rated in the country for her field

2) internships–domestic or overseas–are required as a part of graduation completion

3) housing is guaranteed for all four years (again, more peace of mind for me than for her)

4) strong support system in terms of mandatory meetings with various advisors

5) there is a dance program in addition in addition to her field of study

(Incidentally, TWU had several of these benefits, too, but you had to work much harder to find these things out).

Cons

Our first concern was the level of diversity.   When my sister attended this same school years ago, our niece remembered vividly going to church and having someone ask to feel her skin.  In fact, neither of them left the area with fond memories.  Before we as a family of girls embraced our natural hair, finding a salon once our daughter left home was a huge concern.   Thankfully, the Lord has ordered our steps such that she won’t have to worry about that quite as much.   The University is more diverse than I would have thought, but there is still the reality that Iowa isn’t exactly what one would consider a melting pot.

The weather poses some obvious concerns as well, as I stated earlier, for our cold-natured daughter.   I’m still not convinced that she’d survive 4 winters of 26 degrees as a high–very different than 1 day.    However, she feels as if she can make it, and each time I’ve questioned how realistic is this opportunity for her, her response has been, “Well, Mom, you just have to layer and bundle up.”   I simply don’t want our money bundled up in beauracracy if she decides this wasn’t as she thought after the first close encounter with months of winter.

Closely associated with the weather concern is the transportation issue.   Our vision was that our daughter would probably take what is now our second car to school with her.  She’s in no hurry to drive in Texas heat; how in the world will she navigate  in Iowa snow?    She quickly caught wind of the shuttle system that is widely available throughout the campus and around town (Ames is a big college town), and has stated numerous times that the shuttle is a viable option to her having to drive around in conditions that are not comfortable for her.

She obviously enjoyed the tour.   So as of right now, it is a definite possibility.   She has one more trip to take in late April.   I look forward to the “come to Jesus” we’ll have this summer regarding her fantasies versus our realities.  Start praying, friends.

Current Events:1st Crack

In my last post, I shared my youngest’s desire to add current events to her course work, and, to a larger extent, to emulate her brother and sister.   She’s completed her current events for 2 weeks now, and her results are well worth capturing.    Here is a sample of her summary.

“Stitches of Hope”

 

 

‘There is a 30-foot flag that represents the country of America.   When our American flag got badly torn with holes almost everywhere, but our flag survived.  Seven years later our flag was sent to Greenburg, Kansas.  After a terrible tornado, member[s] of Kansas used flags from around the world to repair a flag from 9/11.   Then, the flag took a vacation and had more Americans help the poor little flag.   Even the local navy sewed the flag.’  

 

Definitely some work to do, but I love a child’s way of figuring life out.   My personal favorite is the flag’s decision to take a vacation–too funny!!

Uncertainty

Uncertainty.

1. The condition of being uncertain; doubt.

2. Something uncertain: the uncertainties of modern life.

Synonyms: uncertainty, doubt, dubiety, skepticism, suspicion, mistrust

These nouns refer to the condition of being unsure about someone or something. Uncertainty, the least forceful, merely denotes a lack of assurance or conviction: I regarded my decision with growing uncertainty.
 
 
I don’t think that I’ve ever prepared for a year with this much uncertainty–not even during our first year.   Maybe it was naivete, but I prayed  ALOT, did my homework and began to execute, even in the midst of my sister and niece being here to help with a newborn baby.   So, this year, as I began to envision what the kids would do, my task was to quit agonizing about what might happen and instead function within what I know right now.   With that in mind, I developed our plans.     Here are the highlights.
 
 
Plans for the youngest were perhaps the easiest to make.   I’m much more comfortable with a plan for the fundamentals, even though admittedly, they are not my favorite to teach–too much redundancy.   What is most exciting to me is that we will use my curriculum to teach her American History next year.   A customer asked me about blog posts that feature the kids using A Blessed Heritage’s products, and it was then that I realized that the last time I taught the children using the elementary product, I had yet to start blogging.   Life pre-blogging seems like a long time ago!
 
 
The most work I needed to complete for her was to develop a reading list.   Though we’ve read some great books over the years, I also wanted to incorporate some fresh reads for the sake of the older two, who often listen in from the adjacent room as they complete their work.   Several of her reading selections are Sonlight staples that we have enjoyed, partly because that’s what’s on our shelves.   Some of  Tanglewood Education‘s selections round out our list nicely with selections that don’t always appear on many homeschooling reading lists, especially in the genres of mystery and science fiction.
 
If there is one word that defines the time I spend with the older kids,that word would be ‘classics.’    I often talk to the kids about cultural literacy and understanding the context of language past just the words.   This is one of the many benefits of being a life-long reader.   When their Disney shows start with ‘it was the best of times, it was the worst of times…’  they should have some sense of where those words come from, and what is their significance to the rest of the episode.   Our son wrote a brief biography on William Shakespeare in his commonplace book and found out that even seemingly silly comedies like “She’s the Man” (Amanda Bynes, Channing Tatum) and  “Deliver Us from Eva” (Gabrielle Union, LL Cool J) are based upon Shakespearean works.   By the way, did you know that Shakespeare struggled to consistently spell his own name?   How ironically hilarious is that?!!
 
Our son will begin high school next year, although there are still a couple of areas where he’s at a middle school level.   Like the oldest, he will start a year of ancient history using a Great Books curriculum.   With our daughter, I definitely learned alongside of her as Homer helped us define the word drudgery together.  (Scroll down on this post to see my daughter’s take on Homer and ancient pasttime activities).   I am much more prepared for what these classics look like in terms of work schedule and actual “feel,” if that makes sense.
 
Of course the oldest and her part-time college career present the lion’s share of our uncertainty.    Her current summer schedule is such that she’s in school four days per week.   My plan would hinge upon her going to school twice per week and then completing work at home in the afternoons.    Our first fight regarding my plan was that she wants to be more involved with dance than what I had listed will allow.   I am hoping that she’ll recognize the accelerated pace of college and realize for herself that she cannot take on everything that she’s done in the past.    Of course, if not, I am prepared to play the spoiler in order to see her succeed in all things (rather than succeeding at dance to the detriment of her academic education).   She began class Monday, where she found out that her first paper was due on Wednesday; that was a rude awakening, to say the least.
 
I hate scratching pieces of  the plan that I had for her.   It is as much a lesson in pride for me as it is a lesson in letting go, as I discussed in my “Losing Control” post.    Before I looked into the Government class at the college, I was busily investigating early American history living books and thinking about reading schedules.     Now I am constantly reminded that she will have to learn some things from others with a very different perspective, i.e., worldview, than we have.     A friend suggested going over certain aspects at home, and I planned the reading list to do just that, but the reality is that our time will be limited.    Between the pace of college, letting her go to dance sometimes so that she has some physical outlet and place to express creativity in that way, and her pace (let’s just say she won’t be accused of not stopping to smell the roses), one-on-one reading is subject to happen more sporadically than I like.   I had too many of those experiences this year where we’d pick up a book, then put it down for days, and everyone, including me, would have to get reenergized about it.
 
Speaking of needing energy, right now we’re moving–slowly–through Don Quixote, the Man of La Mancha.    I’ve tried not to “force” school and make the summer boringly academic.   But this book is 600+ pages, and not at all the hilarious epic adventure that I remember as a kid.   Maybe because my husband once sold pharmaceuticals to psychiatrists, neurologists, etc., the kids have keyed in on poor Quixote’s mental state, and it almost reads like a tragedy to them.    I’m going to abridge this one myself so that we can move on.
 
Anyway, I look at this definition, and though uncertainty doesn’t, in and of itself, sound so bad, there are other words here: doubt and mistrust.    Yes, when I list my plans, there is much room for doubt, and I have good reason not to trust in my own abilities.    My will gets us limited reward, but I’m looking for more than mediocrity.   So I must choose to substitute different words for doubt and mistrust:   
 
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;  in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil.  This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.
 
 
Proverbs 3: 5-8 

Excerpt from Caddie Woodlawn

 Caddie’s father’s words to her, reflecting upon her fear of growing up and becoming a young lady:

‘It is the sisters and wives and mothers, you know, Caddie, who keep the world sweet and beautiful.   What a rough world it would be if there were only men and boys in it, doing things in their rough way!  A woman’s task is to teach them gentleness and courtesy and love and kindness.   It’s a big task, too, Caddie–harder than cutting trees or building mills or damming rivers.   It takes nerve and courage and patience, but good women have those things.   They have them just as much as the men who build bridges and carve roads through the wilderness.  A woman’s work is something fine and noble to grow up to, and it is just as important as a man’s.   But no man could ever do it so well.   I don’t want you to be the silly, affected person with fine clothes and manners whom folks sometimes call a lady.   No, that is not what I want for you, my little girl.   I want you to be a woman with a wise and understanding heart, healthy in body and honest in mind.’

from Caddie Woodlawn by Carol Ryrie Brink

Losing Control

We have two weeks of school left.

Usually by this time, I would already have summer reading lists compiled and printed off for the children.   In my defense, I have at least talked to my son about what I want to do.  

I plan to simply keep school going with our youngest daughter.  When I reflect upon her school year, there is too much low-hanging fruit for me to feel comfortable about a clear, seamless transition into third grade.   As one example, I still think she needs to “seal in” the concept of borrowing when subtraction.   Once she completes the first problem, she fine.   Yet, almost every day, I have to remnd her that, if the larger number is below the smaller number, you cannot simply reverse the numbers, i.e., 7 – 9 is not the same as 9 – 7.   I have to remind her all too often that since you are borrowing 10, it is as easy as placing a 1 in front of the number that you are adding to (as I write it, I realize that I sound equally confused!)  With the text having introduced borrowing from the tens’ columns and the hundreds’ column, she also sometimes forgets which column to borrow from.   Finally, there are also days when she’s very distracted and starts adding some numbers and subtracting others.   GEEEESH!   So the summer will give us an opportunity to slow down and gain confidence in this area.

We’ll also continue handwriting.   This week, she accomplished the difficult cursive “S,” and so she can now write her full name in cursive.  I intentionally delayed teaching cursive to give her more of a chance to gain confidence with a pencil and to work on the right direction for the “ball” of the letter “b” or “d,” or which way to turn a “j”–challenging lessons that all little ones must tackle.

What’s stopping me from bringing my “A” game?  Three things.

1) the heat. Spring is my absolute favorite time of year.  It’s when I crave the outdoors, the cool morning breeze that begs you to be out and about in the garden.  However, this year, we had no spring.  We went from winter to summer, and at a time when many in this country are experiencing flooding, we have not seen rain in weeks.   All our flowers and grass popped up, and just as quickly, it dried out and died.   Now I find myself in a bit of a funk after not seeing a hibiscus bloom after a fresh rain, or seeing my mimosa blossoms shrivel almost immediately after blooming.

2) the busy schedule.  In four weekends, I have had to prepare, as a parent prepares (given that I’m not the one actually performing), for a science competition, two dance competitions, and a prom.    Most Sunday nights I have crawled into bed, and most Monday mornings I wake up behind.   Hence, nothing that is outside of the norm do I accomplish without Herculean effort.    Searching book lists, reviews, descriptions, etc., has simply been more than I can do right now, especially with my laptop dying a slow death ( and consequently, the kids standing over me in line while I attempt to check off a few to-dos  on the family desktop).

3) the life-changing decision to allow our oldest to enter college early–at least as a part-time student.   The state of Texas has a wonderful partnership between community colleges and high schools, including high school homeschools.   With the dual credit initiative, a high schooler can complete college courses at a greatly reduced rate (like less than $200), receiving college credit and high school credit.    Most Texas 4-year colleges and universities readily accept these credits, saving parents bundles in higher education costs.   Many homeschooling parents actually enroll their children at junior college as Associates degree candidates, and then send them off to 4-year universities as degreed students for their final two years.   We went to all the meetings and thought well in advance about what a wonderful benefit this would be to both the oldest, and to us.   It all sounded great–that is, until now, when it is all about 3 weeks from happening.   Now I’m feeling as I felt when we packed her up at 3 years old and sent her off to private school, only worse.   Back then, I was convinced that we were giving her an early start on the best education money could buy; now I know that we’ve got the best education love can afford right here at home.   I’m struggling with her possibly learning history from another perspective rather than it being His story.   I’m struggling with the people with whom she might come in contact.   I’m struggling with all the plans I had that will probably not happen with her before she goes farther away to school in a couple of years.   How did this moment get here so fast?  

Having said all of that, I am also rejoicing.   In spite of my angst, I know this is a great opportunity for her, and I’m proud of her for stepping up to this challenge.   I’m proud of me and the realization that I had a little something to do with getting her here (not to take away from my husband or the Lord).   Most of all, I’m thankful that the Lord loves this mother hen (as my husband describes me) enough to allow me to gradually, lovingly, lose control.   Not that I’m misled into thinking that I had control anyway, but now, as these four walls become increasingly inadequate to  protect her from what she’ll encounter, I’m glad she is His.

P.S.   We finally got a bit of rain today.   Guess I’d better get busy.